Yesterday, here in the newsroom we solved your potential tax increase problems by inventing a new voting system … your City Council must fight out a roller derby match against the Bellingham Roller Betties. If the council wins (unlikely), they get to increase taxes.
But along the way here at our little sandbox, commenters offered up the absolutely-required roller derby nicknames for the council members.
Ken Oplinger offered up a few: Gene “The Knife” Knutson; Barry “The Butcher” Buchanan were just two of his suggestions.
But Shaun was most definitely on a roll, not only offering up some hilarious names, but some exposition to go along with them:
Don’t let that smile that says I don’t feel comfortable smiling fool you. This jokester is red hot as one of the longest serving oxygenarians on the council and is presently serving as it’s fearless leader. After years in Cold Storage that could not even come close to cooling his passions, and a lot of weekends spent watching local football that probably came close to cooling his wife’s passions, this pigskinner will do a number on the nearest hapless Bettie and it won’t be just for the gipper.
I give you Knute the Brute.
Check out all of the offerings from Ken and Shaun (including Jack “Johnny that” Weiss-muller and Dan “Picante” Pike), right here.
June 10th, 2010 at 1:35 PM
Jack “the punker” Weiss!!
Jack “honest Abe” Weiss!!!
Terry” the cherry” Borneman !!
AFY!!theheelotsheepdog!!!
June 10th, 2010 at 1:40 PM
Dan “post road” Pike!!
AFY!!theheelotsheepdog!!!
June 14th, 2010 at 3:06 PM
So Sam, I’ve been meaning to ask. Did we at least get some hate mail from the council chambers? For a wannabe practitioner of the comedic arts, silence is the cruelest form of catcall.
June 14th, 2010 at 3:36 PM
Nope, no responses at all, Shaun, not even from the mayor, who is more than happy to swap jokes with me. It did, however, make the rounds of various roller derby websites and blogs. They all really, really liked the idea.
June 14th, 2010 at 4:27 PM
Political comedy is dicey. We have had some pretty nasty campaigns of late and it’s maybe tough to ask a person giving of their time generously for such little reward, and because they’re local and not removed from the animus to laugh at themselves. 99% of my riffs just came from looking at the photos and bios and finding a way to humorously pump them into Bettie worthy foes. I only really regretted one comment I made about his honor who has always been so kind to me in the past. I won’t elaborate, but I had forgotten certain ugly accusactions from the battle of the Dans as I had missed the last ugliest days while lounging in Italy. Oh well, it’s a tough room.